Friday, August 04, 2006

Time To Defend My Captain

I've been getting a ton of grief when this came out....

NEW YORK - Derek Jeter cologne is on the way.

Derek Jeter's cologne will be called Driven.
Avon Products Inc. has signed the New York Yankees shortstop to a deal in which it will create a men's fragrance called Driven — "reflecting the unique personality of one of the most driven men in America," according to a news release from the company.

The fragrance, the first in a line of men's grooming products bearing Jeter's name, goes on sale in November.

"I have been very involved with creating this fragrance — everything from the blend of scents to the design of the bottle and logo," Jeter said in the news release. "I did have some help, however. Because women buy a large percentage of the men's grooming products sold in the U.S., I asked my mother Dot and sister Sharlee to be part of the project.

"I wanted to make sure the final product was something men would like to wear — and that women would want them to wear."

The fragrance is a blend of chilled grapefruit, clean oak moss and spice.

As soon as I saw this in the paper the other day....I knew the crack committee of Yankee haters would be on my ass. Here's this clever little ditty from the Metsmaster....

Oh my God!!!
What's next? Derek Douche?
I've always thought this guy was a "pinstriped pussy".
"Chilled grapefruit, clean oak moss and spice"????
Somewhere "The Mick" and Billy Martin are howling.
What an age we live in. "Real Yankees" now smell like French faggots.

Now first off, what would a scion of Sheas know about what a true Yankee would or wouldn't do for a buck? It's well know that the Mick, Billy or any of those Yankees would have done anything for a few extra bucks much less the cheddar that Jetes is probably getting to put his name on this cologne.

These guys worked in coal mines, sold insurance and did other odd jobs in the off-season to pick up some extra change. You think they would turn down the chance of a seven figure payday because some retard from Queens thought it was gay? They'd probably do it just pull to new and improved talent aka trim.

As for calling jetes a pinstriped pussy, well, when the Mets produce one Cooperstown bound position player like him then you can call him anything you want. Until then, worry about beating Marlins or whatever second-rated teams you play in the NL East.

Finally! We get a quality start from the back of our rotation. It could get really ugly if this becomes a habit.

I know I sound like a broken record, but I'm enjoying the relentless nature that this lineup is starting to develop. Interesting move putting Abreu in the three spot and moving Giambi down to five. It takes away some of Abreu's agressiveness on the basepaths, but it puts a better average hitter in that spot and provides protection for A-Rod by batting Giambi behind him. It also increases Giambi's RBI opportunities with three high OBP guys ahead of him in the order.

I know the schedule for this month is brutal compared to the Red Sox, but with their pitching problems, no victory is a given as we saw tonight. Beckett has filthy stuff, but he's finding out how difficult it is to navigate these AL lineups over the course of a full season. This is also the first season he hasn't been on the DL so these innings are starting to pile up on him.

People keep talking about the heroics of Papi and company with these ninth inning comebacks. I see something else. If they're struggling against the Tribe, what happens when they face the big dogs?

This is a team in trouble and now we've got the lead back, we need to break out the shovels. I'm not naive enough to think we're gonna have 10 game lead at the end of the month. But I don't think four or five is unrealistic.

Bruce Chen vs Randy Johnson should not scare me. But why do I have a pit in my stomach when I think about tomorrow's matchup at Camden Yards?

This Yo-Yo stuff with Randy has to stop. A prime opportunity has been presented to the Yankees to create some distance between them and the pack and maybe get Detroit in their sites for homefield. Let's not trip over a Bruce Chen changeup.

Happy birthday, Bobby Smith aka Daddy. I love you and I miss you. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of you.


Blogger Metstradamus said...

Defending Captain Poof, will ya?

All the crap you dish out about Piazza...did he ever have a cologne that smelled like oak spice, chilled grapefruits and peat moss? Don't think so.

And if you're going to defend your captain, please don't call him Jetes. That's almost as metrosexual as being the new Avon lady.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Don Ballgame said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:00 PM  
Blogger Karen said...

I'd rather my guy hawking cologne than pickling his liver. But I guess now heavy drinking and putting yourself into an early grave as a result are the standards for True Yankeeism. It's dizzying, really.

3:45 AM  
Blogger kigogal said...

The Yanks are looking GOOD lately! (And I guess thanks to Jeter smelling good, too.)

Man, I've got to get a Tivo or something. I get home every day just in time to watch the last - maybe - 3 innings. It's awesome, though! Gonna be a very fun next 2 months.

My prediction is that the Yanks win the AL East with no problem, and that the Red Sox slip behind and don't even make the wild card...

7:30 AM  
Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

Too many jokes. Must mock Jeter.

9:19 AM  
Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

Why do I get the feeling if a Met fan coined "Jetes" you would be looking to use the Death Star on him. I agree with Metstra, what a lame-ass knickname. Thanks for that, I will use it going forward.

At least the next time he takes an unnecessary show-boaty dive into the stands to catch a foul ball, he will smell pretty.

And if he gives a bottle to A-643, at least Alex will smell like a clutch hitter.

9:31 AM  
Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

* knickname - freudian slip whenever I use lame-ass, I think of the NY Knicks.

nickname is correct of course.

9:35 AM  
Blogger Darth Marc said...

I didn't coin the nickname Jetes...his manager and his team were calling him that a lot longer than I've been writing this blog. Good enough for them....good enough for me.

Don't you Mets fans have a cab accident to get into or a save to blow to the Nats or something?

Somehow, I bet Jeter will comeback in 2016 when they celebrate the 20th anniversary of that first championship under Torre. Kind of says something about your organization when the best postion player your system has ever produced (Sorry David Wright) wants nothing to do with you....

10:49 AM  
Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

As for the Nats, what is thee Yanks record against them this year Darth? 1-2.

As for Straw, he is dead to me. No class drug addict. Let him be a mercenary for the Yanks. He fits in well there.

Wright, in time, will break most of Strawberry's records. That's if Beltran doesn't beat him to it.

"Jetes" is still lame.

11:01 AM  
Blogger Darth Marc said...

Beltran didn't come out of your system...rather free agency.

How does it feel rooting for the second best team in New York?'ve been used to that your entire life.

Come to the dark side, Ed. The girls are prettier and water's warmer....End your suffering...

11:12 AM  
Blogger FenwayParked said...

I know I'm late.
In a way this one is just too easy.

3:04 AM  
Blogger Ed in Westchester said...

Darth - oh, so we are going to do game by game tracking for best team in NY? Please. The last resort of the scoundrel.
I have no worries about the regular season. My team will win the division. Yours might, but how much energy will they expend to do so.
As for the girls being prettier, I like mine fine thanks.
True, Beltran was a FA. Point was Straw's records will be broken.

6:12 AM  

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