Why The Damon Move Was Worth It....

A great man once said this to an infidel....

"Young Fool...only now, at the end, do you understand...."

Now the infidels understand the game we play...why Homo Larry in Boston penned us the evil empire. If you read Bill Simmons Mail Bag , then despite any trepidations that Yankee fans might have about bringing in the Rebellion's poster boy, the pain and suffering that it's causing Red Sox Nation right now makes it worth the risk.

Here are some of my favorites from the mailbag.....

I'm so distraught after hearing the news of Johnny Damon going to the Yankees, I don't know what to think. Until now the Red Sox/Yankees and Star Wars comparisons have always been thin, but when I read the news I felt like Obi-Wan Kenobi in Episode IV when Alderaan was destroyed.
-- Mike Kmiec, Phillipsburg, N.J.

If the Yankees are the Evil Empire, and the Red Sox are the Jedi, undoubtedly Johnny Damon is Anakin Skywalker becoming Darth Vader. The only quetion left is who is Luke?
-- Ted Simmons, New City, N.Y.

My answer is to the second one is this....there is no Luke. There is no happy ending in Episode 6. Only more heartbreak for infidels. And Damon is not Anakin either. He's not an important enough figure in this rivalry or drama to gain Anakin status. He's a minor figure in the large scheme of things. Only one player in this rivalry has acheived "chosen one" status. Isn't that right, George?





As for the Alderaan analogy, well infidel...just imagine how you feel when the Death Star takes a right turn and heads north to the Nation? It's going to be a cruel summer, friends. I can't wait....